Jasmins Marzipane

Sample spray of pale pink eau, on promo card featuring bottles from the Maison Lancome collection.

This is so marvelously intriguing–a simple white floral that’s really a James Bond femme fatale in disguise.
Comes in with a big hello of jasmine to the entire room, begging questions at social distance–Is that violet? patchouli? heliotrope? cigarette ash?–then winks with a smirk, because no, they’re actually almonds and cashmere musk being clever.
Vanilla and sandalwood leave long trails in personal space like theme songs that get stuck in the head for hours and hours.

Bold and smart, and not as sweet as first impressions might give.

*

A 007 twist that makes Katy Perry’s classic intriguing again–(I adore PMJ.)

Grain de Soleil

A mini bottle of red amber eau with Fragonard’s iconic sunburst cap in silver, sitting on fresh snow.

I needed a bit of sun today, and this little beauty gives big powdery vanilla amber warmth with just one drop. (Really, just one–this stuff gives off melting honey rose trails a mile long.)

Sandalwood and cinnamon on the bottom keeps the marzipan-ish heliotrope from getting sticky, and adds some maturity to the vanilla.
Lasts all afternoon and through the night on clothes, leaving sweet spice dust behind like footprints in the snow.

*

Stay warm, yeah?

Star Cross’d

Gold capped bottle and canister with marvelous unicorn constellation and celestial motifs on blue.

Five stars for the packaging, I’d like that design as a mural on my ceiling, but the first spray is a synthetic, skin-burning, cleaning solvent mess, and it doesn’t get better.

TokyoMilk #87 lists citrus leaves, water lily, frankincense and vetiver, which somehow adds up to the most abrasive lemon oil ever–
After fifteen minutes murky pond weeds grow a foot off the skin, just to add further insult, but luckily the base takes care of that with a nice dose of Pine-Sol fumes.

Might be a good one to keep for when guests call to say they’re coming by, and you can’t be arsed to clean–you’ll at least smell like they’ve interrupted you scrubbing the floor.

*

I’m fairly picky when it comes to covers of this song–Seven Nations’ is good, and so is Rick Springfield’s, but today I need Jimmy Little’s soothing version.

New Baby

Demeter mini splash bottle with black cap in my hand, and a mini in a yellow onesie holding my fingertip.

Demeter’s New Baby is an oddly exact mix of milky vanilla, mineral oil and powder that starts with a shriek, but soon settles to cuddle space with sleepy lemon curd.

Comparing it to the source material was fun but a bit startling. The lactonic notes–almost animalic–are very similar, and there is a definitely a sugar cookie thing going on, especially on the top of their little head. (Apparently there are Scientific Reasons why newborns smell so sweet.)
I’m not so sure how the lemon pie on the bottom relates, but it’s a nicer sour than burpings.

Very sniffable, but wearing it might require your own car-seat and diaper bag.

*

Yep, I’m gonna be this this grandma.

Aqua Allegoria Passiflora

A gold topped beehive mini bottle with pale pink eau on a white box with magenta accents.

A tropical fruit freshie that disappears from the skin in 30 minutes, leaving a sour baby-spit-up stain on clothes.
I get none of the promised ylang-ylang or crystalline lagoon waters, and I’m rather annoyed about the whole experience.

The brand website irritated me even more, with its suggestions for layering this scent with others in the latest collection.
At $140 a bottle, we’re paying you to properly blend the fragrance, Guerlain.

*

A good bad mood song.
(The whole album is awesome.)

VideCorMeum

Red bottle paper cutout tester, black velvet bag and sample spray–all with luxe copper accents.

Rich honey rose and vanilla incense, roughed up with some crushed herbs–as if Amouage Fate and Absolue Pour Le Soir met for antipasti before a fancy event–then skipped it and went for bezoin ice cream and meaningful conversation instead.

I don’t often think of perfume as an accompaniment to food–but this would be amazing on a romantic dinner date.
Leans more toward silk neckties than chiffon scarves, and lasts long into the night.

*

Another gentlemanly rose–
Alejandro Rose-Garcia goes by Shakey Graves when he’s not acting.

Beetroot

Fresh beets with a mini splash bottle of Demeter Beetroot cologne.

Okay, yes.
Beetroot is weird–an undead gourmand?!– but it’s interesting.

Begins with a big shovelful of the same dusty soil opening that Zoologist Bat has, cellar dry, and cool.
The sweet notes in the middle are an hour or so of white sugar–granulated crystals without fruit or flowers or spice–oddly earthy in its purity, and rather fun.
The end lasts another two hours, a smudge of dirt on the skin, with subtle smoke that reminds me of Tank Battle.

Not one for daily wear, but I’ll douse myself in it for the local Zombie Shuffle next Halloween.

*

El Wencho is awesome!

Ashore

Amouage sample spray, and package featuring a watery sunset.

Nice at first–
Starts with spiced whipped cream-y jasmine in personal space that slowly drifts to a hand-span off the wrist as the cardamom ripens–then it takes an odd turn as curried raw salmon for a few hours.
The rose sticks to clothes more than skin, with sweet resins that last most of the day.

I’d enjoy it more without the fish course.

*

This song has absolutely nothing to do with the ocean and has no sushi.

Quelques Notes d’Amour

Varigated sunset rose and rectangular mini bottle with heart cut into the corner filled with pale pink eau.

Starts with raspberry tooth polish for kids and a whiff of loaded diaper, and finishes with fresh hamster cage shavings, but the big patchouli rose in the middle is nice for an hour or two.
Affordable but if you want a pre-school teacher vibe, DKNY Be Delicious is the better bet.

*

Hey, happy new year, year?
Here’s some Debbie Harry that should not be played in the classroom.

Untold

White cat with a pink nose sniffing a crystal mini bottle with quilt lines cut into the sides. There’s a hint of cassis-catness in Untold, so use a light touch.

A wealthy aunt perfume. She spends more on handbags than her nieblings pay for tuition, but she gives cool birthday gifts and is the first one they come out to.

Cut glass pears and white flowers, with a sprinkle of ground pepper. Ends on folding money musk and soft patchouli.
Not bad.

*

Woke up with this stuck in my head this morning–it’s raining, too warm for December but I’m not complaining.